Olympic Sport Suggestions

Baseball and softball, two symbols of America, will not be played following the 2008 Olympic games. Because of the loss of these two great American sports, I propose many new sports for the 2012 Olympic games.

-Tetherball. The film "Napoleon Dynamite" brought a resurgence in the popularity of tetherball among high-school students. They will be in their peak tetherball years by 2012.

-Competitive Ouija Board. This sport will go over big in countries with a voodoo/witchcraft tradition.

-Breakdancing. This will inspire the current generation of urban youth to pursue their dreams of one day breakdancing on a broken down cardboard box in front of millions.

-Filibustering. The ultimate endurance sport.

-Competitive Eating. Don't discount the dedication of these obese, sedentary athletes.

-Dodgeball. Do I have to explain this one, fat kid?

-Competitive Pole Dancing. I just want to see pole dancing, I don't have a convincing argument.